Femme Posse Meeting

October 7th, 2006

"Femmes at Work"

Attendees: Cat, Debra, Dyani, Hillary, Jessica, Julie, KC, Leslie, Michelle, MJ, Michelle, Monica, Shdiva, Stacy, Stephanie, Tonya & Victoria. Facilitator: Leslie. Host & Time Keeper: Stephanie.


  • Potluck & Social
  • Intro to New Coordinators
  • Meeting Structure Overview & Announcements
  • Intro & Welcome to new members
  • Topic Discussion
  • Open Discussion
  • Exchange & Clean-Up

    We welcomed the new coordinators of the FemmePosse: Leslie, Julie & Cat

    Business Items were at the beginning for this meeting only due to recent changes in leadership. Going forward, it will be the last agenda item. Leslie reviewed the new meeting structure and grounds rules for open discussion.

    A suggestion box will now be available (near the food) at each meeting for topic ideas and feedback. All feedback received will be shared with the group at the following meetings.

    Meeting topics will range from 4 category types:

    1. Experiential
    2. Analytical
    3. Speaker/Demo
    4. Hands-On or How-To

    We began by welcoming the new-comers- almost half the attendees! (Woo Hoo!) Then did introductions around the room.

    What is your profession?

  • Social Worker
  • Scientific Writer
  • Professional Singer
  • Librarian
  • Sex Researcher
  • Legal Secretary
  • Web Developer/Tech Writer
  • Customer Support
  • Artist/Writer
  • Disabled
  • Sales Trainer
  • Business Systems Analyst
  • Chief Financial Officer
  • Contract Programmer
  • Physician's Assistant
  • Free-lance Make-Up Artist
  • Paralegal
  • Student
  • Clinical Physician
  • Massage Therapist
  • Professional Dominatrix
  • Touring Manager
  • Software Engineer
  • Homemaker

    Are you out at Work?

  • 90% Out of the Closet at Work
  • 10% In the Closet/Discreet

    Femmes at Work

  • It's Better in the Bay Area to be out at work.
  • Most feel isolated from straight women more than men in the workplace.
  • The group is split 50/50 that being Femme is harder than just being gay.
  • Self disclosure is always going to be an stronger issue with service professions that work with the public.
  • Being gay at school is not an issue at all, yet the idea of Femme is not as easily accepted.
  • Femmes given the stigma of being dumb.
  • Sometimes it's not the issue of being out as gay or femme. Most times discrimination still comes down to race and/or religion.
  • The Bay Area has pockets of acceptance. Not every part of the bay is 'safe' just because we're near San Francisco.
  • Time has made a huge impact with how we're accepted in the workplace and in our community, but "Femme-Phobia" still exists.
  • Most agree that it's sometimes easier to be accepted in the workplace as a Femme. We can duck under the radar and the gay issue is not in their face. Butches have it harder in some areas, however they do have the advantage of being obvious and not having to officially come out.
  • Being Femme didn't affect our job choices, however we hypothesized that it's not the case with Butches. "It takes more confidence to stand tall in corporate attire for Butches than for Femmes.

    After the wonderful discussions the Femmes continued to munch, socialize and do the exchange. There was tons of great food and Stephanie's place was fabulous!